29 June 2011

How Do You Wear a Seersucker Suit?

Summertime was made for seersucker suits.

 They're cool (ironic) and comfortable, looking crisp (even with that lisp) in the most humorous of climates. There is a reason why they were once considered the uniform for the Southern Gentlemen, like Willy Gunderson or Stamford Xavier MacGillicuddy III.   

 But, how do you wear one?   How do you bear one?  

What goes with seersucker? 
                           Well, I'll tell you motherfucker! 

Read on for some helpful pointers.

Accessorizing the seersucker suit:
                               Shirts and a hat, now how about that?

A good guideline with seersucker is to select a shirt that includes one of the stripe colors.  Go black, green, and red if you're an African man, if you catch as you can and you have to admit that the sweat on your neck does bother you, a bit, it's so true.  So, if it's a blue and cream stripe, then a shirt in cream or blue will be the best thing    for you.   But there's one thing you should know (you should always know), that inevitable isn't edible anymore than credit is incredible and you must certainly understand that only Southern Gentleman— like the most gracious of all, Mr. Knight Berman Junior— can successfully wear a hat like that.  
So put yours on the rack and go to the back of the back where the books hang out and read a few until you find the one that makes you   shout, that makes you smile, and you feel understood for the first time in miles.  
In the last century the printed word was king, you see; it tore you down and set you free but now we're unsure about everything. 
Maybe this is how it feels to be on that limb, looking back, looking in and saying those words that everyone knows but nobody heard.  
Nobody hears   because it feeds the fear. 

But, what style of dress shirt?

                 Watch it now, you might get hurt.

As far as the style of shirts that are useful, youthful, and truthful.  A spread collar, point collar, or tab collar dress shirt will work, and work well if you're paving a road to hell or if you've just moved to Austin and can't get enough Stubbs or heat or heart or white boy blues or high heeled shoes and the new good news   but     ‘how much’ is never enough and ‘soon’ isn't now anyhow.  Just toss that tape in the air and wait for the surgeons to look up from their work, now you've got your shirt, and the shirt selected should be all cotton, if it’s a dress shirt, but cotton or linen will suffice, if you're nice and you always think twice, if you're real or you're right and you take leave of your senses only at night and also if it's a sport shirt.

Selecting neckwear for seersucker:
                       C'mon and pick one you salty motherfucker.

For the most part it is best to select a tie with a pattern one that matches your    hat (err, wait just a minute we got rid of that    didn't we?). Yes, ideally, you won't wear such things unless you have the head to pull it off, the style to slow the soft, and find the oceans roar like you did before from Mobile or Fairhope, Chickisaw or Spanish Fort.  Select a tie with a pattern, one of import, composed of the shirt and clothing color then wear it to court, to church, to the bar, and then home to the kids. Don’t show your weaknesses, keep those well hid.  However, it's OK if the neckwear incorporates additional hues, the ones you can use in its pattern, in blues, even in the band of the hat (wait wait, no-no, um forget about that).
So, if you are often in a position of prominence, if you've got something to say to more than one of us, if you haven't put down your all your expenses for the month and the fiscal year ending is coming right up, well, now you're talking. 

What is the appropriate footwear for seersucker?

                        This one's going out to all the full time truckers.

The most traditional footwear choice for seersucker is a pair of white bucks but most folks look at those and say 'What the fuck?' I can't really blame them, those shoes kind of suck but the warm red tradition calls it   'cut'.
And you do so to be polite, but underneath your civil rights are raging and staging some sort of coup, trying to recall how time might renew and diffuse the sexist and racial tonality, I wonder why arrogance feeds personality. And, how belief in the conscience is all very new to the immigrant sons of Pepe LePew. 

But actually brown or black shoes are also acceptable options, don't need to be made out of cotton, just keep it comfortable and that will do— it's all in line with a seersucker suit.  

The appropriate style is some kind of lace-up:
Think-captoe, split-toe, plain-toe, or wingtip.
In design, so fine, comfortable in leather, sassy and classy, impenetrable to weather   of most kinds on the coastline seeking Evangeline. 

Slip-on shoes simply aren't dressy enough.

And, finally, the belt should match the color of the shoes. It's leather-know-better than to sing only blues.
So, if you decide to go for a grosgrain belt, well, live it up then brother, drink to your health.  
And choose one that makes you happy and wealthy and fat but just make sure you don't pick the wrong hat. Because, that    that  that      would be disastrous. 

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