11 May 2012

the umbrella term


i have been awake for nearly an hour
delineating the small
incremental differences
between naivete’ and hope
between bravery and desperation

it’s good to bring up
the question
and maybe
the anxiety

might be what keeps us all
from slipping into some kind of
permanent sleep

and of course these things are gonna affect me
so far from anything
that looks like home

the limb walking continues
and nobody has any idea just what is happening
just what constitutes
me
 anymore

you spend enough time in the pattern
in the rut
people start to think you don’t know how to dance
 that you’ve given up
and even though both of those certainly have been truths
    for me

the first little part of dancing
is not being afraid to move your feet
and when you look at it that way
what is there to be afraid of
it’s got nothing to do with luck
i mean
you’re not reinventin’ stuff
you’re just getting up
and getting down
coming in to your own shade of brown
and it takes some longer than others
to that i can attest

it might look like this shade is well loved
but let me take this time
to file the official protest
because it is really
     only
about the same
 as others

and a little late to boot
just like jun said
when he was so relieved
that i had no intention
of making him take a drink
but wanted to know why i started so late

      culture
is a funny little thing
and i wonder how far
that umbrella can reach






10 May 2012

finding what matters is why i came


the first full day is shards of carbon in hong kong sunshine

monday morning
earlier than usual
          in front of
             but

ultimately
 behind
the west


this time ninety days
is supplanted
with conflicted growth
 from the high eighties

from the prison of
a regrettable decision
constantly dripping

slow
   and   sharp
                 

loop notes
fall back
go to fours  
to great heights
melody soars
         above all mistakes

near the water
near the red car
with only a nine second pause
to remember the scar
then
     pack it away
with packaging tape

finding what matters
is why i came


son and heir


 it was a wedding ring moon
round   and gold
but missing the finger of the hand
  i wanted to hold


i was
left waiting somewhere
near iron bound tracks
waiting and wondering
if she would come back

and if the whole thing
                                turned black

 because

or in spite of