hedgehog on a wheel

brown noise+

oscillating fan+

wind=

a long night made not so long

    laughter

by bobby hill

                 remembering who was wrong

      where they come from

what needs to be done

milton

pushing

coasting

just past the two story wendy's

just into kate's place

the smile

is on kate's face

intermittent

no charge

on the reset

you

take your first left

drive on out to west jeff

sloane waits there

black bear inn

turns to heaven    dirt road

up hill

both ways   and    just enough snow

should i stay

                           or

should i go
’later’   lied

in two replies

and neither really

will suffice

but the time that came

passed     me     by

and left me sinking

 into

christ

m a s

past

the call

never came

sleep never left

i dreamt i was pregnant

and drunk the whole time

what have i done to the baby is it mine?

‘the walls we build up stone by stone’

you are almost alone

but the good is gone

so    why are you three hanging on?

playing tired country songs

from kingdom come to kingdom kong

                  my girl

                                    the fat girl

                                                      drew me once     in a blue swirl

didn't use it

change     read    plan

are you tired boy?

are you re-ran?

gorgeous into

non

sequitur

place in cold earth

hear your             heart work

take a t shirt

make it hard

make it                 hurt

stop looking for the noose

i know i was

younger then

and that’s still

the plan

for as long as

i can

the scuff marks

on his floor

tell stories

that aren’t quite true

anymore

when you lose

the ability

to stand

look straight

hold still

reach for my hand

this is easily worth a dollar

one night

just a little while ago

i sang to the wind alone

tried to push the

song

to falsetto

there are no deserts in the midwest

i’ll tell him myself

once and for all

the right thing

is seldom

the thing that is done

the blue sky turns black

take off your shoes
stop looking for the noose

now is not a time

and the deal’s gone wrong

did you call

i’m not drunk enough to sleep

it made an impression

the applicable rate

leave a message

who does that

anymore

keep going

don’t stop

let’s not argue about it

i’m trying to get you out

                                    take me home

                                                take me home

                                    take me home

i always meant to be reputable

ending the fascination with youth

with potential

              in truth

these kinds of things die slowly
       they always act like

                  they don't know me

in the open street

     in open air

near the big concrete

                when i stop to stare

at  the house kept neat

   complete complete

get enough to eat

          but expect to leave

      expect to be

     suspect

to be

        object

to be

          circumspect

at night time

and in the day light

with a smile       lies

    the    boot

        brown

                 eyes

time

     is

tight

      except that

it's not

it is anything

            but

right up to

and until

the clock tick 
                     tock

says time 
                       is

                  up

i always meant to be reputable

      but

will it stay fair

that question knows its answer

     it never

really

    was

and

curtains work wonders    

with whys

           and because

c for calvin c for clifford

c for calvin c for clifford

            they broke the record

mensch

         cut what makes sense

what makes me nervous 

    recompense

       shut it down

 turn around

   least of all

common ground

     this is your favorite movie

no wonder you’re depressed

       don’t tell me he did it

did it sound like he did it

he did it    he did it

      could it

would it

no        of course not

did that sound like a gunshot

          okay  it did   the harm was his

so here i sit

and there is no tangerine slice

it’s one hundred and twenty percent black and white

   it’s an ode

an homage

to a different time

made by a different man

who didn’t need spotlights

he did need starlets and circus nights

     but words on the page

had to suffice

 until the celluloid soon made everything right

left siobhán and the shy one

         to i a l diamond

under cover of the california night

these boys

      made it so that the sun wouldn’t shine

unless it happened to ask

and if it was wearing a mask

          then what’s rising would last

into the into the into the    past

with a look   and a laugh

honor intact

   never pander to anyone that’s just a fact

he told the truth like a magazine

               centerfold    beauty queen

it’s just that no one is listening

    to him    or

to me

          anymore

the near future

go directly to ‘bryter layter’ and listen repeatedly to ‘northern sky’

then meet me under the western new york bright star light for the first snow of the new season  late in the fall  geographical treason won’t matter at all  stand under those stars   marbles in hearts let the falling snow fall   over us all  breathe       and long      sing that song

never felt magic     crazy as this

      truth

but not      you

today was different the air was wetter there were phone calls designed to remember to forget her and i appreciate your idea that it will get better    someday in one way she’d tell us to let her

we deal with finance     finance and feeling that alone will get things reeling   and shaking like memories firm in the making  hard not to notice the word wake in awaken   on the monday in spring    she was finally taken

      and i know   to be awkward near you  has a future